So I was browsing around and came across these little tidbits and couldn’t help but to share. Hope you all enjoy!
A new, young MD when doing his residency in OB, was quite embarrassed performing female pelvic exams. To cover his embarrassment he had unconsciously formed a habit of whistling. The middle-aged lady upon whom he was performing this exam suddenly burst out laughing and further embarrassed him. He looked up from his work and sheepishly said, “I’m sorry. Was I tickling you?” She replied, “No doctor, but the song you were whistling was “I wish I was an Oscar Meyer Wiener.” – unknown, courtesy of Jack Shea
Dear God, I have a problem; it’s me. – unknown
Defend me from my friends; I can defend myself from my enemies. – Canning
Eat a live toad the first thing in the morning and nothing worse can happen to you for the rest of the day. – unknown
Golf: A good walk ruined. – Mark Twain (1835-1910)
He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire. – Winston Churchill, a gentle needle
I believe the only time the world beats a path to my door is when I’m in the bathroom. – unknown
I can’t be out of money, I still have checks left. – unknown
If at first you don’t succeed, skydivings not for you. – S. Johns
If you must choose between two evils, pick the one you’ve never tried before. – unknown
In God we trust; all others pay cash.- American (on money)
It was a cold winter day. An old man walked out onto a frozen lake, cut a hole in the ice and dropped in his fishing line. He was there for almost an hour, without even a nibble, when a young boy walked out onto the ice, cut a hole in the ice not far from him. The young boy dropped his fishing line and minutes later he hooked a Largemouth Bass.
The old man couldn’t believe his eyes but chalked it up to plain luck. But, shortly thereafter, the young boy pulled in another large catch.
The young boy kept catching fish after fish. Finally, the old man couldn’t take it any longer. “Son, I’ve been here for over an hour without even a nibble. You’ve been here only a few minutes and have caught a half dozen fish! How do you do it?”
The boy responded, “Roo raf roo reep ra rums rrarm.”
“What was that?” the old man asked.
Again the boy responded, “Roo raf roo reep ra rums rarrm.”
“Look,” said the old man, “I can’t understand a word you’re saying.”
The boy spit the bait into his hand and said, “You have to keep the worms warm!” – unknown, courtesy of Jack Shea
and the number one saying for this evening…
Life isn’t like a box of chocolates…it’s more like a jar of jalapenos. What you do today might burn your ass tomorrow. – unknown